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Tried to take a picture; Of love
I wanna fill this new frame; But it's Empty
Henry, 21
12 January 1989
National University of Singapore, Nursing
He loves books,
his family
and his awesome life!
fan of: harry potter & helping others to the best of his abilities
I wanna fill this new frame; But it's Empty
{/profile --
Henry and Life
Henry, 21
12 January 1989
National University of Singapore, Nursing
He loves books,
his family
and his awesome life!
fan of: harry potter & helping others to the best of his abilities
Tried to write a letter; In ink
I've got a piece of paper; But it's Empty
Thank you.
Thank you for the love. The constant love and attention showered on me. I really appreciate it. Every bit of it.
Thank you for the care and concern. The urgency in your voice when you found out that i am not feeling well. The urgency in your actions to buy for me medication, bandages, good food and everything else just to make sure i will be comfortable.
Thank you for the fun and joy. Your cute face, your cute actions and your endless cute expressions never fail to make me smile and wanting to squish your cheeks. =)
Thank you for the forgiveness. For forgiving me time and again for doing the unspeakable. For forgiving my stupidity and insensitivity.
Thank you for the patience and understanding. For always willing to explain things time and time again, and sometimes even explaining the same things, just because i am too dumb to understand certain things. And for understanding my beliefs, my habits and my weird behaviours.
Thank you for the appreciation. For laughing at my jokes, for understanding my point of views when no one else does. For listening to my big theories when there is no one else there to understand.
Thank you, pig.
Thank you for everything.
Ever had that feeling when you feel that nothing is going right in your life? Ever had that feeling that you suddenly who you truly are? Ever had that feeling that your world is spinning and spinning, and all you want is for it to stop so you can take a breather?
I've got a piece of paper; But it's Empty
{/Henry Lamer and the Eternal Gratitude --
Monday, March 12, 2012 ( 9:48 AM )
Thank you.
Thank you for the love. The constant love and attention showered on me. I really appreciate it. Every bit of it.
Thank you for the care and concern. The urgency in your voice when you found out that i am not feeling well. The urgency in your actions to buy for me medication, bandages, good food and everything else just to make sure i will be comfortable.
Thank you for the fun and joy. Your cute face, your cute actions and your endless cute expressions never fail to make me smile and wanting to squish your cheeks. =)
Thank you for the forgiveness. For forgiving me time and again for doing the unspeakable. For forgiving my stupidity and insensitivity.
Thank you for the patience and understanding. For always willing to explain things time and time again, and sometimes even explaining the same things, just because i am too dumb to understand certain things. And for understanding my beliefs, my habits and my weird behaviours.
Thank you for the appreciation. For laughing at my jokes, for understanding my point of views when no one else does. For listening to my big theories when there is no one else there to understand.
Thank you, pig.
Thank you for everything.
{/Henry Lamer and The Lost Soul --
Tuesday, March 06, 2012 ( 6:36 AM )
Ever had that feeling when you feel that nothing is going right in your life? Ever had that feeling that you suddenly who you truly are? Ever had that feeling that your world is spinning and spinning, and all you want is for it to stop so you can take a breather?
Don't worry, _______ is here to solve all your problems!
Lol... Just kidding.. That wasn't a commercial tagline. It was a Henry's-life-is-screwed-up-line. It's really funny that i can sit down here and tell you that we should never complain because you have so many things that alot of people in this world do not have. But yet at the same time, i can sit here and wallow in self pity that my life sucks.
Ok, maybe it doesn't suck. And that i don't do wallowing. But still, i must say that i am caught in a fix right now.
The song "Fix you" comes into mind. But nothing can fix me.
Ok, maybe not nothing.
But anyway, right now, at this moment, i feel that i am not performing any of my roles in life properly.
I am not a good son.
I don't go home early to have dinner with my parents. I spend more time outside than at home. I don't try to organise activities for my family. I don't spend more time talking to my parents. I spend more time in my room playing computer games rather than in the living room watching TV with my parents and talking to them.
Latest update: After asking my mum whether i have fulfilled my duties as a son. She told me that i haven't done any housework since my brother went in, one week i spend maybe only a day at home, Tuesday come home for dinner also come home like close to 9pm, studies also not say very good, every night sleep so late morning need to call so many times then can wake up. I asked her whether she has anything nice to tell me, she said no. And the best part is, i haven't even asked my dad yet.
Further update: My mum just came into the room and tell me, i have a good heart, have good ideas, just that i never put it into action. I am so young, but memory is already so bad. Brother ask me help him find things, i also can forget.
I am not a good brother.
I am becoming more lazy to write letters to my brother. My letters to my brother are becoming shorter. I am no longer finding things that my brother needs.
I am not a good boyfriend.
I am not cheering my girlfriend up enough. I am making more mistakes than ever. I am not making my girlfriend happy. I am not showering enough care and concern to my girlfriend. I am not making my girlfriend feel special enough. I still don't know how to keep my distance from other girls. I keep making my girlfriend cry. I am not sensitive enough. I am not smart enough.
I am not a good Christian.
I am not doing what God has encouraged me to do. I made my bible teacher upset. I am not reading my bible regularly. I am not reading my DAILY scriptures daily. I am not reading the other publications regularly. I am not praying often enough.
I am not a good friend.
I haven't met up with any of my JC, secondary or NS friends for a really long time, DESPITE me saying that such friends are very important. I haven't talked properly to anyone in class. I am spending lesser and lesser time with them other than class time. I am not replying my friend's smses fast enough.
I am not a good student.
I am not doing well in my studies. I am not actively practicing my skills. I am not revising enough. I am not spending enough time on my work. I waste too much time doing stupid stuff.
I am not a good person.
I am becoming more judgmental. I am becoming less responsible. I laugh at people behind their backs. I make fun of people. I disturb people.
Who am i now, really? Am i still the Henry that is funny, responsible, down to earth, charismatic and sociable? Or am i now another person, one who is evil, judgmental, irresponsible and anti-social?
I sit here while typing this blog and think. But i can't come up with a decent answer.
I don't know myself anymore.
My bible teacher is right. He said that he feel i am lost. I AM lost.
How true the bible is, when it says that Jesus once said that if everyone turn against him, then those who follow him and be turned against by the world too.
But the only problem is, i am being turned against by everyone. Because, i am having the sitting on the fence syndrome. Not believing fully in God, and not willing to fully let my old life go. What do i seek in my life now? What do i plan to do in order to deal with all these problems? What CAN i do to deal with all these problems?
Will things ever turn right for me? They will. And i know what i need to do. But the problem is, am i willing to do it? Can i do it?
It's time to let my gears run again....
If we; Should be getting under
These sheets; We could lie in this bed; But it's Empty
These sheets; We could lie in this bed; But it's Empty
{/tagboard --
i think they call it freedom of speech
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designer DancingSheep
Trying too hard; Maybe we're torn apart
{/links --
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{/archives --
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{/credits --
designer DancingSheep
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts; We're Empty
now playing
How you live, point of grace
Is beating our hearts; We're Empty
{/miscellaneous --
my virtual barang
now playing
How you live, point of grace